Trisha did decorations, Liz did flowers, Mary made feet charms to add to all of our sister necklaces. Shara did amazing job on programs, Megan and Lisa helped out so much with the girls the last few days and all the grandmas pitched in like crazy. The boys dug the grave last night and have all been such great support to Adam. Adam's cousins-Melinda and Mandy pitched in and did videography and amazing photography. Amy has cleaned my house multiple times and watched the girls to help. We have also received so many meals and encouraging notes from so many people. Overall, I have felt so much peace and love because of all the support from my family. Not to mention all the friends that have brought endless gifts and the constant love we feel from the entire ward.
As I walked into the viewing room I had so much emotion come over me. This day was going to be hard and I just knew it. I wasn't sure if it would be as hard as when we had to leave Brigham at the hospital, but it was definitely a final step that we had to make. Olivia and Asia both got up on a chair and just admired him. They both looked at their beautiful brother with so much kindness and love. They truly adore him and I wish so bad they would be able to be his sisters here on earth. Even though they won't, I know that the influence Brigham will have on them in this life will be irreplaceable. We put some things in the casket for our little boy and had some family pictures. We had our family sign 2 baseballs and we put one in and we kept one. Team Briggs wristband and Olivia and Asia made him a bracelet and a beautiful picture and we put a picture of Olivia, Asia, Family, Adam, me, and his best one. Then Adam and I put the letters that we had wrote to him.
He looked so good in that casket, I was so surprised at how beautiful he still looked even though it had almost been a week since he died. We had cotton to fill in his hat and his outfit was a beautiful one piece with 6 buttons on the front. He had beautiful Booties from Sister Slagowski in my ward, and my mom bought his outift and nice blanket that went over him. We put a onesie underneath and socks just to make sure he was snuggly, I was surprised how the preemie onesie fit him perfectly. He was such a big kid for his age. He was my perfect son and will always be.
As people started coming in the viewing my heart started beating a little faster. I was getting so nervous for that pivital moment when I would have to watch them close the casket for good. I knew no matter how bad I wanted to freeze time that would eventually happen.....anxiety kicked in a little and I searched out for my Dad. I just needed a hug and a little pep talk like he has done so many times in the past. When I went to him the tears started coming, he was having a hard time holding it back as well. He helped me compose myself and then we continued with the viewing process.
We we gathered the family in Adam got to say the family prayer for our little boy. It was sweet and heartfelt and I know Brigham was there in the room comforting us as we listened to a emotional prayer from a loving dad. Family then came through the line one by one and then we had to say our goodbyes. The girls all grabbed his hand and said we love you baby Brigham. I wanted to grab him out and just squeeze him, but instead I rested my hand on his chest and expressed my love to my sweet perfect boy. Adam leaned in and gave him a kiss on the cheek and we started to wrap the blanket around him. After we wrapped him I had to unwrap him just a little to see his hand and hold it one more time. After wrapping the blanket around his face and over his body they were about to close the casket and I wanted to stop them with all my being..... In my head I was saying STOP..... that is my boy.....I want to see him.... but the reality of it is that no matter how long I stared at him he would not come back to life. He was gone from this mortal life and it was and is such a hard pill to swallow.
The lid was put on and the water works began.... Adam and I both hugged eachother with all our hearts and then Adam picked up the casket and we all followed into the chapel. As we entered the chapel it was full clear to the back. I was overwhelmed at how many people came, it had to have been at least 200, because he had 150 programs and they were all gone. I felt a lot of eyes on us as we walked down the isle, but it didn't stop my crying... it just kept coming. By the time we sat down my emotions were a little better. Here was the program:
Opening prayer-Michele Welch-grandma
Opening song-Lead Kindly Light
Chorister-Carolyn Smith-Grandma
Talk-Hans Jacobson-grandpa
My dad was very emotional and cried which was such a tender sight to see. He did such a wonderful job and talked about a sailor steering their boat in rough winds. He said us as parents were strong and kept the faith. He bore a profound testimony of the plan of salvation and that our Brigham still lives and that we will be reunited someday.
Song--Our Angel Brigham by mom(piano/vocals) and Dad(cello)
Talk-Tim Welch-grandpa
Dad did such an amazing job and touched my heart. He said that if Brigham was here he would say to his mom-Thank you for not giving up on me. That through everything I didn't give up on him, even when doctors advised me to abort. Then he said Brigham would tell his dad that he was so honored he was his son and appreciated all that Adam did to honor him.
Song-Families can be together forever-Olivia
Letter to Brigham from Mom
Letter to Brigham from Dad
Bishop Martin-remarks
Pres. Terry-quorum of the 70
Pres Terry taught some remarkable things, but at the end he gave us a apastolic blessing over the pulpit. He promised that when we see a temple, go in a temple, or pass a temple we will feel Brigham close to us. He went onto say how the Quorum of the 12 and 70 give their love and support and I couldn't help think about my letter to Pres Monson.
Closing song-I feel my Savoir's Love
During the song Olivia got all teary eyed and said mom I miss Baby Brigham. I could tell she was feeling the spirit with the beautiful song and I think she is so tender she gets overwhelmed by it sometimes.
Closing prayer-Lori Jacobson
After the ceremony in the chapel Adam carried sweet Brigham and we followed and all grandparents and us got to ride over to the cemetery with Briggs in a limo. The graveside service was very sweet and Adam did great on the dedicatory prayer. After the prayer we all gathered together and we all sang "families can be together forever."
After the prayer a lot of people went back to the lunch, but a few family and us Stayed to finish the burial process. Adam laid his small little casket in the ground and they brought nice soft dirt over and we were able to shovel it and cover the casket. Adam, grandpas, brothers and nephews started covering it. Then I wanted to shovel as well. It was such a spiritual moment for everyone involved as we quietly covered his grave. Adam and I were the last ones to leave his grave and we bowed our head in a prayer to thank our Heavenly Father for letting us be a part of our sweet son's life. Brigham has truly taught us so much about love and what life is really about. I would have loved and will have always wanted to raise him here on earth, but that was not what Brigham needed. As parents we felt at peace that we gave Brigham exactly what he needed. I feel that from the sacrafice we had done for him, he would and has blessed our lives tremendously in return.
Adams dad and us returned to the luncheon and reunited with our beautiful family who has supported us all along the way. They have truly been amazing. Everything was so beautiful and we made a slide show with music and pictures that was playing during the luncheon which brought such a sweet spirit into the room. We had a great lunch with sandwiches, salads, chips, and cake that was provided by both our Provo ward and the American fork ward that Adam grew up in. We had about 200+ people show up to the service and about 90 people stay for the lunch.
After we said our goodbyes we drove past our little Brigham's grave and stopped right there and said hi and bye to our little guy. His grave looked so good with the blue and white flowers on it. One of the arrangements had a big B and a BYU football in it which Adam loved! On the way home it started raining and it actually was beautiful to see the rain come down so strong. We had cried a lot that day and it was as if our Heavenly Father or Briggs was crying back. But with crying and rain, the rainbow will someday come. I know that heavenly will bless us with a rainbow and we will be eternally blessed by having our sweet Brigham in our family! My friend Triana passed our house after the funeral and she said there was a beautiful Rainbow right above our house. Here is a picture of that beautiful Rainbow.
No comments:
Post a Comment